The Ship

In 2007, I opened my first Etsy shop with my friend.  I primarily sold jewelry at that time.  I also opened a Facebook account to promote my shop.  At the time, my friends and family were still on MySpace so the only "friends" I had on Facebook were other Etsy shop owners.  The interaction was minimal.

Gradually my friends and family migrated from MySpace to Facebook (sorry, Tom!).  My attention to my Etsy shop ebbed and flowed over the years and most of those initial "friends" were deleted as I used Facebook for more of a personal use.  However, there were a few of those initial Etsy shop friends who I found interesting and kept around to see what they created.

Over the years, I started interacting more often with two ladies from that Etsy bunch.  We would comment on photos, comment on each other's statuses, etc.  I bought some photos from one of them.  An online friendship began to develop.  From there, they introduced me to other friends they had online with similar interests.  

We started to have long message threads of conversations until one day, one of my brilliant friends created a private Facebook group for us to interact regularly and privately.  It is a very personal and sacred place for me so I will only refer to it as The Ship.  Initially we had a larger group of women but life happened, cattiness happened, and some of them jumped ship.  Then there were six of us aboard The Ship.  One of them is my sister who I brought aboard to grow closer to her as well.

Over the last couple of years, I have checked in with those five ladies every day.  We know intimate details of each other's lives.  We've helped each other through difficult life changes and problems.  We've shared a lot of laughs and had a lot of ridiculous conversations.  We are located all over the United States but geography does not dictate our level of closeness.

We've texted, talked on the phone, sent notes and packages to each other, and some have actually met in person.  I'm writing this today because one of my shipmates is in town visiting her father, who just happens to live in a neighboring town to me.  She and I are going to meet face to face for the first time this afternoon and I can't wait!  We all talk about one day finding a way to all get together in person.  It's tough with geographic distance and busy schedules but it will happen.  One day.

I write all of this because these ladies and this ship have helped me to grow in ways I would not have imagined.  They are all so very different from me yet somehow we have commonalities.  I have learned how to be more open about my feelings which has helped me with other relationships in life.  I have learned to look at life differently and to be more open to experiences and people.  When I am feeling out of sorts and can't figure it out, I just type a rambling, jumbled mess and my girls help me pinpoint what is bothering me.  They inspire me to be more creative.  They make me laugh.  A lot.  They've helped me to become a better friend to my oldest and dearest friends.  Their encouragement also helped give me the confidence to make a new friend in my town last year.  When I was completely dorky and excited about this new friendship, my shipmates joined in and encouraged me.  As a result, that new friend is one of my closest friends.

The Ship has been afloat for over two years now and I think it will exist in some shape for a long time.  While I believe that we may go through times where we don't chat as much, I know if I called out with a need, those five ladies would be there in a heartbeat.  

Those who know me in person would probably be surprised that I have developed these online friendships.  My husband was skeptical at first but he has grown to know these ladies through my stories and has even become Facebook friends with some of them too.  He has seen my growth as a result of these friendships.  I think he's somewhat excited (or at least curious) to meet one of my friends today too.  It's weird to refer to it as "meeting" her when I know so much about her already.

For all their faults, technology and the Internet have definitely provided me with an opportunity I would not have had without it.  An opportunity to develop strong friendships and to grow as a person.  The Ship is a big part of my life and I wouldn't change it for anything.  Thanks, ladies (you know who you are).  

Buddy Book

It has been quite a while since I mentioned my journal obsession and, more importantly, the Buddy Book (or Buddy Books, as it were).  However, I am true to my word so here is a glimpse into the Buddy Book.  This is not something I typically share but I figured I can give you a little peek.

To understand the Buddy Book, you need to understand the buddies who own it.  My dear friend, Gina, and I have been friends for about 20 years now.  We met in the sixth grade but she didn't care much for me at that point.  Something about a boy...if you can believe that about sixth graders.  I would say it was the end of seventh grade to the beginning of eighth grade when we truly became friends and stayed the best of friends through high school and on.  We have lived 500 miles apart since we were 19 or 20 years old but have managed to stay extremely close.  She has stuck by me through thick and thin -- graduations, boyfriends, illness, eating disorders, depression, marriage, miscarriages, child rearing, starting an Etsy shop together, dreaming creative dreams together, etc.  She is a true friend and I can't imagine my life without her.

Over the years, we have kept in touch via telephone, snail mail, email, social media, text, etc.  In 2004, Gina had an AMAZING idea!  She sent me a sketchbook for Christmas that she had started for us to keep track of silly, mundane, normal, abnormal, big, little, important, trivial, and all other things that happen to us in our day to day lives.  Things that we might forget to share on our next phone call or email.  Ridiculous things that we thought were funny.  Doodles when we are in a boring meeting or class.  A little piece of our brains and hearts etched creatively into a journal.  Each of us would keep the book for several months and use it as much as we could, then mail it to the other.  It was genius!  The Buddy Book was born.

I always love opening the mailbox and finding the book -- sometimes I know it's coming and sometimes it's a surprise.  Sometimes life gets in the way and the Buddy Book collects dust but it's always there waiting for us to come back to it.  I really like responding to things she wrote like we're having a long drawn out conversation.

At one point we had two Buddy Books in circulation so we would each have one at the same time.  Then we would try to swap at the same time to see what the other had added.  We've journaled deep thoughts and feelings.  We've also added things like this photo below...

Over the last couple of years, the Buddy Book has taken a bit of backseat to life.  However, I know it's not gone forever.  It's still there, waiting for both of us to pick it back up and start again.  Just like our friendship - sometimes we go through periods where we only talk a couple of times in a month, while other times we talk each week (sometimes a couple of times a week) - it takes effort to maintain a close friendship but we ebb and flow just like life does.

Gina is an artist to her soul and she encourages and inspires me to continue on my own creative path.  When we are able to get together in person, I always walk away with a ton of ideas and excitement to try something new.  She is an adventurer and lover of life.  She is witty and kind and thoughtful.  She is my buddy.

I don't know where I would be in life without her.  I know we will be buddies until we are old and gray, laughing about ridiculous inside jokes, eating ice cream, and swapping Buddy Books when the mood strikes.  I am so happy she chose me as her friend.

So, there you have some snippets of the Buddy Book.  What kind of things do you do to keep in touch with friends???